:: Oh, Look, A Tumbleweed ::
Guildenstern: Our names shouted in a certain dawn...a message...a summons...There must have been a moment where we could have said no. But somehow we missed it. Rosen-? Guil-? Well, we'll know better next time. Now you see me, now you- -Tom Stoppard, R&G Are Dead
:: Friday, April 08, 2005 ::
This. Is. HYSTERICAL.
But only if you've had to deal with Whiteside and Portrait. If you have, then this is quite possibly one of the funniest things I've ever read. So, if you liked Portrait, so sorry. If you didn't, then this is awesome. And if you haven't read it, the full effect of this poem will be lost upon you and for that, I am sorry, because this is some funny shit right here.
And after doing the MWDS for Portrait, I could not agree more with the third and fourth lines.
James Joyce
He was stupid
He didn't know as much as me
I'd rather throw dead batteries at cows than read him
Everything was going fine before he came along
He started the Civil War
He tried to get the French involved, but they wouldn't listen
They filled him up with desserts
He talked about all the great boxers that came from Ireland
Like he trained them or something
Then he started reading some of his stuff
Right as we told him to get lost
He brought up the potato famine
We said "Your potatoes are plenty good"
"Deal with it"
"Work it out somehow"
Then he said "America must adopt the metric system,
it's much more logical"
We said "No ! We like our rulers, go away"
Thomas Jefferson said you always get the rulers you deserve
-Matt Cook
You can also see the video of Matt Cook reciting this poem here: http://www.worldofpoetry.org/usop/life2.htm
It makes the poem even funnier.
:: Nick Friday, April 08, 2005 [+] ::
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